Always pain before a child is born
Still, I’m waiting for the dawn”
If you live the human experience long enough, you are going to find struggle. You are going to find disappointment and you are going to experience loss, heartbreak, heartache and perceived failures. And while you sit with these realities in the darkness and silence, then the voices start. You know, the really accusing condemning ones. They sound like this:
- You’re not good enough
- You’ll never make it
- Everyone else is better
- It works out for other people
- This has no meaning
- You’re not worthy of goodness
- No one cares
- You screwed up
- You’ll never figure it out
- blah blah blah insert negative judgmental piece of crap lies from the pit of hell here
These dark nights of the soul are like a bully on the playground, the lies want to suck the life out of you and put you in your place of insignificance. It is there where the fight for truth is held, it is there in the middle of the battlefield of your life where you sit and make choices. With the enemy creeping in on all sides, in the words of Mary Oliver; “tell me, what it is you want to do with your one wild and precious life?”
I’m just a guy going through my own journeys and battles, waking up to voices that seek to keep me in my own place of darkness. Here’s my advice: Do not ‘speak’ into that darkness . . . ‘SCREAM’ that #$%^ing Anthem! The stakes are too high for quiet whispers, this is YOUR life, this is your one, wild and precious life! This is you, there is no one else like you, there never has been and there never will be. By definition you are a bad @$$. Jeremiah 1:5 – “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart . . . ” Before all of Creation, before God placed you in a human family to have a human and earthly experience, He knew you. He has plans. You are not an accident, you matter, you have a name, you are significant. You are worth screaming for. Do not whisper, do not speak, Scream your Anthem! Call your dawn into existence.
11 years ago this month, I lost 2 of my best friends within 17 days of each other. This U2 album was really significant to me then, it helped bring context to the pain and loss I was feeling. That the darkness was okay, it has it’s place. The night is temporary, next comes the dawn. The sun will rise, survive the night. Confront the lies, obliterate them with truth. Grab your soul friend, sit them down, and them let tell you who you are if you don’t remember. Strangle the lies, don’t let them breathe. Choke the poison and spill it out. Do not whisper, do not speak, Scream your Anthem!
What is your Anthem? It is hope, You were destined to count in ways no one else can. Dallas Willard said: “As water is meant to run downhill, so you were destined to count.” Rage your hope, scream your hope, call your dawn into existence. Hope is a primal scream in a world of darkness, let it rip! You matter, you are here for a reason, survive the night . . . dawn will come. And when dawn comes, walk into the light of the justice of your cause, the warm embrace of the sun, the arms of the One who made you and let him bring healing and freedom to your heart and life. When healing comes, when you become a prisoner set free . . . seek vengeance. Go find someone else in their dark night of the soul, and lead them to the light. This is your payback. You are dangerous.
Do not whisper, do not speak, SCREAM your Anthem!
Peace to you.